Love Under Construction: Managing Our Relationship, Building Projects and Pregnancy

Embarking on the Journey: Our Crazy, Beautiful Life

Welcome to another chapter of our adventure! Balancing pregnancy, nurturing our relationship, and tackling ambitious building projects is like juggling flaming torches while riding a unicycle—but we wouldn't trade this crazy, beautiful life for anything.

From the moment we dove headfirst into this journey, we knew it would be a wild mix of excitement and challenges.

So, grab some popcorn and join us as we share the ups and downs, the laughter and tears, and the incredible lessons we've picked up along the way.

Finding Our Piece of Land: A Dream Realized on a Steep Mountain

The journey towards creating our vegetable garden began long before Sami and I even crossed paths. It all started when Sami bought this rugged piece of land, mostly because it seemed like a good idea at the time. You know, as one does with major life decisions. It didn’t come with a plan, just a lot of potential—and by potential, I mean a steep, rocky incline that laughs in the face of modern construction.

This initial step set the stage for our future endeavors, laying the groundwork for dreams that would eventually evolve from mere potential into tangible projects and shared aspirations.

The land is a scenic 50-meter hike from his parents' house, up a mountain that seems determined to keep any intruders at bay. Despite the potential of this land being hard to see with the naked eye, when I first laid eyes on it, I thought, “This is it. This is my dream.” Apparently, my dream involves a lot of sweat, bruises, and navigating a road that’s more like a goat trail on a bad day.

We had zero clue what we were going to do with it at first. Our vision for the land evolved from a vague “maybe we could do something here” to “let’s build a house with a view!” Who knew transforming a mountain could be this entertaining?

Turns out, the land came with its own personality—let’s call it ‘stubbornly uncooperative.’ The steep challenges and tricky road quickly turned this into an epic saga of determination and, let's be honest, sheer stubbornness.

Every time we tackle a new project on our piece of paradise, it feels like the land is mocking us, saying, “You thought this was going to be easy?” But hey, if nothing else, it’s given us some good laughs and plenty of stories to tell. 

Through all the sweat, discussions, and unexpected hurdles, we’ve realized that this piece of land isn’t just about building a house; it’s about the journey, the ridiculous moments, and the satisfaction of knowing we’re turning a wild dream into a reality. So here’s to our steep, rocky, wonderfully challenging mountain—where every step is an adventure and every misstep is just another story waiting to be told.

Adapting Our Dreams: From Homebuilding to Garden Cultivation

Originally, we had a grand vision: build our dream house on our steep, rugged plot of land. Picture it—a cozy home with a stunning view, nestled on the mountainside, our kids playing outside with their abuelitos just a few meters away. We had sketches, ideas, and all the enthusiasm in the world. But then reality came knocking. Hard.

The major snag? Besides major excavation work, there’s no water or electricity. Not exactly the best setup for a cozy home. Not to mention, Sami and I aren’t exactly professional architects. In true 90s-kid fashion, I even built our dream house in The Sims, complete with pixelated gardens and virtual plumbing. It was a fun exercise in creativity since we both lacked actual blueprint abilities and the technology to bring our ideas to life on paper.

But with a baby on the way and conditions that would make building our house more a nightmare than a dream, our plans had to evolve faster than our Sims houses could. So we pivoted to a new, less glamorous, dream: turning our rugged, mountainous plot into a vegetable garden. Because, let’s be honest, when life hands you steep terrain and no utilities, you make garden-fresh lemonade—or in our case, veggies.

Instead of a majestic mountain retreat, we’re now on a mission to transform our land into a lush, green paradise. Right now, it’s all about clearing the land with hoes and rakes—a task that’s as glamorous as it sounds, especially when you’re waddling around with a belly that’s growing faster than our garden can.

Despite the challenges, the process brings me joy—mostly because every weed I pull is one step closer to our goal of a thriving garden, even if my dream house is on hold.

The plan is to transform the steep, rocky terrain into a lush garden, providing fresh produce for us and the local community. But this isn’t just about growing food; it’s about creating a space where we can work together, build something meaningful, and stay connected to the land. Balancing practicality and dreams, we’re turning a setback into an opportunity, and it’s incredibly rewarding.

Building the Bathroom: Prioritizing Family Needs

Faced with a steep, rocky plot and a daunting list of challenges, it dawned on us that our dream house might take longer to build than the Great Wall. So, we decided to move in with Sami's family to help us save money and to give us more time to tackle our garden project.

Living with Sami’s family, we faced the challenge of inadequate bathroom facilities for a household of 5-7 people in their rural area. With no plumbing, creating a comfortable bathroom for us all became essential, especially with a baby on the way.

The whole family got involved in the bathroom project. Sami, his dad, and his brother dug a giant hole for, well, you know, turning it into a bonding experience—nothing says family like shoveling dirt together under the hot sun. We decided to handle the project DIY-style, avoiding professional help, so while Sami and the guys wrestled with concrete blocks and plumbing mysteries, I cheered them on, occasionally pointing out crooked walls and reminding them about light switches.

This project has been an emotional rollercoaster. Balancing our desire to support his family with the reality that our larger dreams are on hold has been challenging. Yet, every brick laid and pipe fitted brings us closer to transforming their home. It's been exhausting, hilarious, and incredibly rewarding all at once.

While building a house on our land seems distant, focusing on the garden and family bathroom projects fills us with excitement and readiness for new challenges. And who knows? Perhaps one day, our aspiration to build a house on this land will become a reality. Only time and the ever-changing future will tell.

Cultural Clashes and Emotional Growth: Navigating Independence and Family Expectations

If there's one lesson I've learned on this journey, it's that "be careful" takes on a whole new meaning when navigating pregnancy in a new culture. Raised to prize independence from a young age, thanks to a Danish upbringing where self-sufficiency is basically a national sport, I've found myself facing a whole new dynamic with Sami's loving yet somewhat overprotective family.

Here in Mexico, maternal care for daughters-in-law seems more customary, a stark contrast to Denmark's ethos of self-reliance. In Denmark, you’re expected to handle things on your own, and asking for help is often seen as a sign of weakness. So, Sami's constant reminders to take it easy often felt like an overprotective commentary on my abilities, challenging my ingrained independence. Transitioning to a setting where care often comes with a side of constant reminders to be cautious has been, to say the least, a bit of an adjustment for me. However, I've come to realize that his concern is his way of wrapping me in a warm, albeit slightly overbearing, blanket of affection.

Adjusting to this new norm has been eye-opening, revealing their care as a different expression of love rather than a limitation on my independence. So, while my inner independent spirit bristles at being wrapped in cotton wool, I’m gradually understanding that this is their way of saying, “We care about you.” It’s an ongoing process of navigating these cultural and emotional shifts, but through it all, we’re finding ways to strengthen our bond and grow as a family.

Strengthening Our Relationship: From Near Breakup to Stronger Bonds

Before starting the bathroom project and discovering I was pregnant, our relationship faced a major turning point. Cultural adjustments and family dynamics exposed deeper issues we had been avoiding. We found ourselves drifting apart, prioritizing self-defense over mutual support, echoing patterns seen in past relationships.

At a crossroads, we had to choose: recommit to each other or part ways. We decided to fight for our relationship, facing the discomfort of change head-on. We realized love isn’t just about grand gestures or feelings; it’s about daily effort and choosing to prioritize each other, even when it’s hard.

We introduced weekly relationship meetings—our new ritual and lifeline. These sessions became dedicated time to reconnect, express feelings, and address issues openly. They allowed us to hit the reset button and remember why we fell in love. We learned to listen without judgment and express ourselves without fear, fostering vulnerability and patience.

These meetings weren’t just about resolving conflicts; they were about rebuilding our relationship from the ground up. We nurtured our bond, ensuring we wouldn’t drift apart again. Through empathy and kindness, we rediscovered the importance of prioritizing each other and facing challenges together. Our relationship transformed as we moved from near-breakup to a renewed, stronger connection.

It wasn’t always easy, but our commitment to weekly check-ins became the foundation of our improved relationship. We faced challenges head-on, embraced vulnerabilities, and emerged more united than before. Now, as we continue this journey together, we do so with a stronger bond, ready to face whatever comes our way, united and committed.

Practicing Love and Patience: Staying Sane Amidst the Chaos

Navigating life with a growing baby, a new garden project, and a bathroom build is no small feat. It’s exciting, nerve-wracking, and overwhelming. Amid the stress and pressure, we’ve had to get creative to keep our sanity intact.

Enter our secret weapon: hugging it out. When tensions rise, a good, old-fashioned embrace can work wonders. Imagine being in a heated discussion about the garden’s irrigation or the bathroom’s plumbing, and suddenly, calling a time-out for a hug. It sounds simple, but this practice has become our go-to for de-escalating arguments and reconnecting. A 30-second embrace, deep breaths, and a reminder of our love can lower blood pressure and restore calm.

Hugging it out isn’t a magical solution, but it’s our quirky reminder of commitment. Think of it as our love potion for chaos; it’s not perfect, but it keeps us grounded. Amid garden fiascos and bathroom hiccups, this hug is our pause button, ensuring we always remember we’re on the same team.

Every challenge, from battling the garden’s rocky terrain to navigating the bathroom’s peculiarities, has become our relationship boot camp. We learn patience, empathy, and compromise daily. And the best part? These lessons aren’t just making us experts in DIY projects; they’re also preparing us for parenthood. If we can handle a leaky faucet and a stubborn garden, imagine how well we’ll do with a baby!

Love, patience, and a well-timed hug are the secret ingredients to finding our rhythm and growing closer. Every hug and shared understanding lays the groundwork for a future that will withstand whatever comes our way—like a waltz through a whirlwind with a side of cosmic humor.

Our Future Plans: Dreaming Together, One Step at a Time

As we look toward the future, it's clear that our grand plans are evolving faster than our garden’s future tomatoes. The bathroom project is inching closer to completion. Who knew that a functional toilet could become the pinnacle of home improvement achievements? It’s like we’re on the brink of a bathroom renaissance. Just a few final touches, and we’ll have a space that would make even a five-star hotel blush with envy (with a touch of exaggeration).

Our vegetable garden is still in its infancy. Picture us as garden pioneers, bravely tackling the rugged terrain with hoes and rakes. As we tackle the rugged terrain, one shrub at a time, we’re laying the groundwork for what we hope will one day be our own personal produce aisle.

Looking ahead, we’re embracing the unknown with the same enthusiasm one might reserve for a surprise party—except this one involves balancing a baby, a burgeoning garden, and playfully debating over who forgot to water the plants. We’re committed to supporting each other through challenges, laughter, and even those stubborn plants.

So, with a wink and a smile, we step forward, embracing big dreams, laughing off mishaps, and celebrating every victory—no matter how small. Here's to navigating the road ahead with optimism, humor, and plenty of love!

A Journey of Love and Resilience: Together, We Can Handle Anything

As we wrap up this chapter, our journey stands as a testament to love, resilience, and adaptability. We’ve faced literal and metaphorical mountains, balanced pregnancy, relationship challenges, and ambitious projects, and found joy amidst it all. From building a bathroom for Sami’s family to postponing our dream home plans and cultivating a rugged land into a future vegetable garden, every step has strengthened our bond.

Patience, empathy, and ongoing growth have been our guiding lights. 

Navigating cultural quirks, maintaining sanity, and cherishing every victory have shaped us. 

Each challenge has taught us something, and every small victory is a reason to celebrate.

Up Next! Giving Birth in Mexico??

In our next blog post, we tackle the financial rollercoaster of preparing for a safe and comfortable birth in Mexico. Join us for an inside look at this crucial part of our journey, from laughter to tears and a few heated discussions.

We’ll share our experiences, challenges, and unexpected lessons learned. It’s sure to be an eye-opening ride!

Share your experiences and tips in the comments—your stories and insights are invaluable. If you enjoyed this post, subscribe for more updates and exclusive content. Together, we can handle anything that comes our way.

With love and anticipation,

Melany and Samuel